Thursday, May 6, 2010

6 reasons why Kin will prove to be another giant success for Microsoft

1. Applications
Phones running Google Android have over 50.000 of applications at their disposal. The iPhone has over 180.000. Devices running LiMo, WebOS, Symbian, BlackBerry, Maemo or even Windows Mobile have thousands. But not Microsoft Kin, which runs crippled customized version of Windows Mobile. It has no apps. At all. No photo editing, no instant messaging, not even a calendar.

2. Flash
Kin doesn't support Adobe Flash. Mobile phone users have no need for such bloated, insecure and distracting features. That's why Kin comes bundled with Silverlight, Microsoft's own Flash ripoff rich-Internet-something-buzzword. With it, you'll be able to play content from Silverlight-enabled websites. All three of them.

3. Games
Who needs games? Games are fun. There's no games for Kin. After all, Kin was designed for teenagers. And everybody knows that teenagers don't play games. Instead, they study hard, only to become Microsoft's engineers when they grow up, and then get laid off as Microsoft is declining.

4. Social Networking
Microsoft Kin, touted as a perfect "social phone", works great with social networking sites. Except those major ones. Like Twitter and Facebook. Kin doesn't allow sharing photos and videos via Twitter. It syncs status updates once every 15 minutes. I can imagine, 15-minute delays bringing whole new experience into Facebook chat. Also, Kin has no IM client. Instant messaging has been obsoleted with texting anyway. You know, just like Windows Mobile has been obsoleted by Google Android.

5. Privacy
Kin stores everything in the cloud, weather you like it or not. Normally that would raise privacy concerns. But this is good old Microsoft we're talking here. I mean it's not like their apps would phone home with hardware information and your personal details? Oh, and Microsoft would never sell your private info to third parties like advertising companies, would they?

6. Security

Remember Microsoft Danger data loss? Microsoft danger, enough said. But seriously, with Microsoft's strong security commitment and previous security record, you would be crazy NOT to leave Microsoft to manage your data.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Microsoft Courier, the iPad killer canceled

Gizmodo: Microsoft Cancels Innovative Courier Tablet Project
According to sources familiar with the matter, Microsoft has cancelled Courier, the folding, two-screen prototype tablet that was first uncovered by Gizmodo.
Vaporware, as defined by Wikipedia is: "a word used to describe products, usually computer hardware or software, not released on the date announced by their developer, or announced months or years before their release. It usually implies a negative opinion of a product, and uncertainty that it will eventually be released."

OK people, let's pretend this never happened, and let's focus on the Myfraudsoft's new tablet device(s), which will undoubtedly be equally successful.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

OT: The missing link?

LiveScience: Humans Interbred with Neanderthals, Study Suggests

Humans today could be part Neanderthal, according to a new study that found our ancestors interbred with an extinct hominid species some millennia ago.
Last week at the annual meeting of the American Association of Physical Anthropologists in Albuquerque, N.M., Hunley and colleagues presented the results of a new study that found evidence for interbreeding between modern humans and some other extinct ancient human species
The researchers looked at DNA samples from humans living today, and found signs of leftover Neanderthal genes introduced from this interbreeding.
"I think we show there's clear evidence in the genome of living people of this mixture," Hunley told LiveScience. "The fact that there's a clear signal implies that there was some significant amount" of interbreeding, he said.
"I have been arguing for this position throughout my career, ever since I began to study Neandertals and other populations," said Milford Wolpoff of the University of Michigan. "It has always seemed clear that some Neandertal anatomy appears in living populations."

Friday, April 30, 2010

Even more Lienux myths

Myth: Linux has no bugs.
Fact: Ubuntu Lucid Leaks alpha version, had hundreds of annoying bugs before it was released, some of which were even critical. Myfraudsoft, on the other hand, never admits any bugs in Windows until third parties discover them, making Windows truly the only bug-free system in existence.

Myth: Linux has all the features.
Fact: While Linux does indeed have the ability to do simple things, such as browse the web, run 3D desktop, play multimedia, power all Google servers or even the entire Internet infrastructure, it still lacks some important Windows-only features. Killer features such as: freezes, random crashes, disk fragmentation, registry corruption, ActiveX exploits and viral infections that are truly critical for businesses.

Myth: Linux supports all hardware.
Fact: If you try to install Linux on a chainsaw or a vacuum cleaner, both of which are very common pieces of hardware, you will soon learn, to your embarrassment, that Linux doesn't support them at all. Myfraudsoft Windows, on the other hand, works on any properly set up piece of hardware.

Myth: All Linux distributions are equal and same.
Fact: Linux is fragmented over thousands of different and mutually incompatible distributions. You can't rely that some properly written malware for Ubuntu will even work on Fedora. Windows malware, on the other hand, works just the same across all versions of Windows, causing hundreds of millions of dollars worth of damage. 

Myth: Linux is Green computing.
Fact: Many Linux server farms, such as those inside Google data centers, consume as much energy as some developing nations. Meanwhile, Windows servers, when properly infected as a part of Windows botnet utilize resources much more efficiently. Windows botnets truly represent green distributed computing as intended.

Myth: Linux is the most capitalist friendly OS.
Fact: Everyone knows that Lunix is an evil communist plot to take over the world. Hence the "red" in Red Hat, and "commie" in community. They are out in the open, not even trying to hide their agenda. This is why the U.S. army, a well known bastion of communism, is the single largest Red Hat customer with over 80.000 systems. Another Linux company, Google, does business in China, which is a communist country... ...err... Crap! They withdrew from China. Well, as they say, exception proves the rule. At least Myfraudsoft doesn't deal with communist regimes... err...

Myth: Windows shills use double standards.
Fact: We do no such thing. For example, two years after Vista came out, majority of hardware vendors were still ignoring it, seeing it as a complete disaster and commercial failure, that it was. So we, the shills, blamed vendors for their lack of suport, instead of Myfraudsoft for producing such piece of sh*t. But when it comes to support for Linux, we blame Linux developers instead of hardware vendors. See, no double standards here.

Thursday, April 29, 2010

More Lienux myths

Myth: Linux runs all Windows software.
Fact: Using WINE, which is, as everybody knows, a WINdows Emulator, Linux can run some Windows software, such as Photoshop, WoW and Counter Strike without problems. However, some business critical software, for example, ActiveX exploits, don't run as smoothly. Others, such as family oriented Bonzi Buddy assistant have never and will never be able to run on Linux.

Myth: Linux has no malware.
Fact: There are over 90 known viruses for Linux, including a few that aren't just school examples of how to write a virus. None of which can do any damage outside of user's home directory.
Windows, on the other hand, has over a million of different programs, ranging from viruses and worms to rootkits, trojans and spyware. However, these kinds of software are commonly mistaken for malware, which is just bigoted haters' prejudice. Windows, in fact has no malware at all, just well written and properly distributed software.

Myth: Linux never reboots.
Fact: In place where I worked, we had a production server running Debian Sid, that had to be rebooted at least once every month. On the other hand, Windows boxes, which were never turned on, or even didn't have Windows installed in the first place, never had to be rebooted. So, it's Windows, when properly taken care of, that never reboots.

Myth: Power users find Linux easy to tweak.
Fact: Tweaking Linux is usually done by editing configuration files, whose contents are written in plain English. Tweaking Windows, which is so much easier, is done by modifying registry keys such as  "HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\Software\Microsoft\Spyware\.config\Magic_Number", where you need to enter simple values such as "ef6db3d0-5399-11df-9879-0800200c9a66". Typing long obscure hexadecimal values in Windows is much more natural then entering plain English words in Linux.

Myth: Linux has more application programs than any other OS.
Fact: Popular Lunix distros such as Debian or Ubuntu pack almost 30.000 different applications inside their repositories. That number is dwarfed by a huge collection of Windows shareware, trialware, crippleware, expireware and lets not forget malware, which alone numbers in over one million. So, if you require crapware you better stay on Windows, because Windows crap will never be ported to Linux.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Dispeling Lienux Myths

I see these fraudulent claims being repeated all the time by ignorant Lunix zealots, so as a faithful Myfraudsoft shill, I decided to stand up to these bullies and publicly dispel their lies.

Myth: Linux is an operating system.
Fact: It's not. Linux is just a kernel of an operating system which is usually called Linux distribution. A kernel by itself can't do much. In fact, without additional software it can't do anything at all. Windows, on the other hand, is capable of corrupting files, slowing network traffic and acquiring malware right out of the box, just like any real OS should. So, in summary: Linux is not an OS. Microsoft Windows is.

Myth: Linux is the most user-friendly OS.
Fact:  Linux requires expert knowledge and complicated actions just to perform simplest of tasks. For example, installing new software requires opening up application called "Software Center" and then whole 3 separate clicks to actually install software. This procedure is so incredibly frustrating and confusing that it's no wonder why Linux is unable to attract new users.
Compare this to Windows, where all it takes is to visit certain web sites, and programs hosted there install magically by themselves, taking over your machine, multiplying on it and propagating further through network.

Myth: Linux is free as in freedom.
Fact: Linux in fact severely restricts freedom of large corporations, to exploit the users and lock them in, especially if those corporations are convicted monopolists. Myfraudsoft EULA, on the other hand, grants complete freedom to Myfraudsoft to do whatever the f*ck it wants, even to change the EULA terms at any time, without consent of their clients. Therefore, Myfraudsoft Windows under the terms of EULA is free as in freedom.

Myth: Linux is free as beer.
Fact: There's no such thing as free beer. Now that we have established that, you need to know that some commercial Linux distributions such as Red Hat or Suse, overcharge their victims via expensive subscription fee. Myfraudsoft Windows is available for as much as $3 in certain markets, making it virtually free. This strategy is known as dumping and it is completely legal monopolist behavior. Therefore Windows is free as beer and Linux isn't.

Myth: Linux is the most secure operating system ever. 
Fact: Linux zealots will deny this, but if you install Linux on a machine and then repeatedly hit it with a aluminum baseball bat, eventually you'll break the machine, making it completely unusable. This makes Linux just as insecure as Windows is. In fact, Windows can be made even more secure than Linux. Just disconnect your Windows machine from the Internet, lock it inside of a steel cage, and place it somewhere high, where it will be safe from madmen wielding aluminum bats.

Myth: Linux can be installed on any PC, no matter how old.
Fact: Another lie by Lunix zealots. If fact, recent distros such as Ubuntu Lucid Leaks can't even install on 286 machines with 360K floppy drives and no hard disks. Windows Vista 7, on the other hand, installs just fine on any older quad core system.

Myth: Linux is the fastest operating system.
Fact: Slow Lunix distros such as Ubuntu Lucid Leaks take minutes to boot from a Live CD on 500 MHz Celeron laptops from over a decade ago. Meanwhile, Vista 7 Ultimate boots just fine from SSD disk, on my low-spec quad core with 16 GB of RAM. Not only it takes no less than 5 minutes to boot Windows 7 on that machine, but there are almost no noticeable slowdowns if I disable the Aero GUI and anti-virus protection.

Myth: All supercomputers run Linux.
Fact: Of the top 500 world's supercomputers, Linux runs on only 427, which makes it less then 86% of market share. Since 86% is considerable smaller amount than 100%, it is obvious that Lunix zealots like to manipulate the statistics in their favour, which means that they are not to be trusted.
Meanwhile, Windows runs on whole 5 supercomputers, making Windows equally or more relevant than Linux in the supercomputing market. Now, if we selectively choose 5 supercomputers, each of which runs on Windows, we can safely assume that 5 out of 5 supercomputers run on Windows. Therefore, all supercomputers run Windows.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Microsoft investigating teenage sex slave labour plant

seattlepi/The Microsoft Blog: Labor group: Chinese teens 'like prisoners' in Microsoft tech factory
Thousands of Chinese teens and young adults work 15 hours a day at 65 cents per hour, prohibited from talking or listening to music, in abysmal conditions at the KYE Systems factory where they assemble Microsoft hardware that is exported to the United States, Europe and Japan.
...
"We are like prisoners," one worker told the NLC. "It seems like we live only to work. We do not work to live. We do not live a life, only work."
Microsoft said it is taking the claims seriously and has "commenced an investigation." The workers – mostly women aged 18 to 25 – work from 7:45 a.m. to 10:55 p.m. They eat horrid meals from the factory cafeterias. They have no bathroom breaks during their shifts, and must clean the toilets as discipline, according to the NLC.
They sleep in factory dormitories, 14 workers to a room. They must buy their own mattresses and bedding, or else sleep on 28-inch-wide plywood boards. They "shower" with a sponge and a bucket. And many of the workers, because they're young women, are regularly sexually harassed...

Just look at those lazy bums sleeping at work. Let me just remind you folks that great civilizations were built on slave labour. If you have moral issues with that, well, then you should know that this is all Apple's fault somehow. Oh yeah, and Big Brother Google spies on everyone, and let's not forget that IBM made deals with the Nazi's.